This isn't what sports is supposed to be like. The Olympics have created this fantasy in all of our heads that we should watch all the sports, regardless of how little we know about it. It's only during the Olympics that I actually give a hoot about canoe slalom, a sport I literally only knew existed just a few days ago.
This is what got me thinking. Why should we have sports which not many people know about? Why not have a sport which everyone can relate to, everyone can enjoy watching, no matter where they are from? Why not incorporate a sport such as...oh, I don't know, just freaking Running Man into the Olympics?
'IMPOSSIBRU!', you snort through your nose, sending your milk hurling through the air. 'It's impossible!' you yell, milk dripping out your nose.
Well, wipe away your milk and stay with me for a bit while I explain my logic of giving Running Man the chance of being an Olympic sport.
If you're not familiar with Running Man, you are severely deprived of entertainment. Running Man is a South Korean variety show, in which participants complete missions to win prizes. That's really what it is. But while most variety shows are staged indoors, Running Man is one of the more unique ones, in which participants get to travel all over South Korea to complete their missions. Every week is a different location so there's no sense of staleness or boredom.
Now that you're a little bit more familiarized with Running Man and what it is, here is why I think Running Man should be in the Olympics. Seriously, I've really given this a lot of thought and I have even done all my research. In no particular order, this is why the Olympic Committee should consider having Running Man in the future Games.
Current Olympic sports are too focused on winning gold medals, breaking world records and making sure that everything is done perfectly. Where's the fun in that? The Olympics needs a little more humor injected into it. Running Man can provide that little bit of humor, with their constant joking, laughable moments and even crazy blunders. I mean, there's a character called HaHa on the show.
This is the first and probably only variety show in which I laughed like a hyena. I mean, who says sports should always be serious?
In Running Man, there are already several different events rolled up into one. I would suggest just a few.
1. The previously mentioned Road Race Mission, split into both individual and team categories.
2. Bells and Seek, where teams have a switching role between Attack and Defend. The purpose is to tear off your opponents nametags, with Attackers having to wear bells while Defenders have to hide.
Nametag ripping. One of the most exciting things you will ever do in your life.
3. One of my personal favorites, Superpower Football. Participants of each team will get a superpower, to be given at random.
With superpowers like air-cutter (able to "fly" through the field), mover of the goalposts (able to move the goalpost), the one with hands-turned-feet (able to use their hands) and wind-blower (can activate five giant fans behind the goalpost), this will make Shaolin Soccer a reality.
The air cutter.
And it's going to be freaking awesome.
This is probably one of the more important factors. Every host nation wants the world to see how beautiful their country is. How do you expect to do that if almost every sport is held inside a stadium? On Running Man, there is something called a Road Race Mission.
In a Road Race, you literally have to traverse into the local suburbs to find clues to help finish the race. This will not only allow the host nation to cut down on the costs of building a lot of stadiums, it will also allow the world to see the more human side of their country.
In every Hollywood sport movie, the underdogs are always rooted for the most. There's something about a rags to riches story of a boy who topples a giant. In Running Man, the underdogs have that chance to turn the tides to their favor. This is evident in Gwangsoo, better known as Giraffe.
He is one of the weakest participants and is constantly among the first to be kicked out. But he still harbors a hope of winning one day. So, not only can any normal man/woman come up into the arena, they also stand a equal chance of winning.
This is one of the main points I made earlier about people who don't know jack about sports like canoe slalom. Running Man boasts a viewership of about 10,700,000 people in South Korea alone. This does not include their fans in Taiwan, Thailand, Hong Kong, Japan, Singapore, Malaysia, Brunei and Cambodia.
Oh look, China is there in the list too. That means a ridiculous amount of supporters are from China, and with them being the current leaders in the London Olympic medal tally, that means there will be a guaranteed viewership if China decides to send in their own Running Man team.
Running Man includes Park Ji-sung and Rio Ferdinand among their fans.
The Olympic sports are all very single minded. For example, if you're a swimmer, you cannot take part in gymnastics because you would suck at it. Running Man doesn't require that you have any set skills. This is what makes it a fair game for all. Plus, imagine the potential lineups. Would you like to see Michael Phelps battle it out with Usain Bolt in the Road Race? Or maybe Lin Dan and Lee Chong Wei teaming up to face Roger Federer and Nadal in Bells and Seek?
These are the showdowns the world would watch, no matter how much they cost. I would watch these showdowns live, making sure I record a copy to be sent to everyone who hasn't.
Olympic Committee, you have seen all the points. Now, why don't you make Running Man an Olympic sport, so that the world can have something to watch other than canoe slalom?
Note: If you actually participate in canoe slalom, I'm really sorry I used your sport in a ridiculing manner. And for all those in the canoe slalom at the Olympics, good luck.
On second thought, it looks awesome as heck. I am so gonna watch this now.